The Duck Dates, Poem and Clay Figure (104/365)

Marvin the Duck
Panics on the way
To the date
Neurotic as usually
He thinks
What if she thinks
I’m a quack
What if she’s
a quack
Who will save me
He pictures his date
Plucking him one feather
At time and lower him in
a vat of bowling water
Nah nah nah he says
Snapping himself together
He looks at his roses
Do they look sad
Maybe I should have gone
For bread
what duck doesn’t love bread
Maybe she gluten free
What do you feed a bird
Who doesn’t eat bread
Oh Nuts!
What if she proposes
Does she want to mate
For life
I’m not ready to commit
For life
I kind of like being
in the water
With the air
But I guess it would be nice
To have another duck
To ride with
Hi guys I would like to
You to meet my bride
Finally after he figured out
Their next 30 years together
He came back to the present
And knocked at the door

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Fear, Poem (103/365)

Fear for me
has never been
Black and white
I don’t know if fear is bad
Or if it’s whats been keeping
Me Alive
Because the moments
in which I lost everything
Are also the moments which built
A fire of fear
That made me never want to go back
And have Ignited a flame of fighter
Fear is also what keeps me
in a line when I start to wander
But fear also stops me
From grabbing you
And asking what went wrong
Fear is rather grey to me
While it holds me
It’s also moves me along

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The Tour Guide that Survives, Poem (102/365)

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She uses a compass

she would use the stars

if she had to

and even if the stars dare not shine

she would be fine in the woods

for she knows how to live

for days at a time

Eating fruits from the cactus

Creating habitats from nothing

She is the tour guide

I always wanted to be

ready for anything

If I was tour guide

I probably wouldn’t be her

I don’t understand a compass

And while I know my  end  destination

a lot like life

I’m unsure of how to get there

The stars no matter

how beautiful and breathtaking they are

Are no help in getting me home

And I pace up and down

How many times I wished to be her

The tour guide with all the answers

The tour guide with no surprises

The tour guide that’s always on point

But it’s sad to think

She will never be Lost

She will never feel the exhilaration

of not being in control

She will never be shocked

to discover the beauty of

unmarked trail

There will be no innovation

And while I can’t

Look at stars,

And know fruits are good

Or all the facts of a Sequoia Tree

if I was  left in the woods

without a phone, without a map

I without doubt would  Survive 

Because I trust my gut

Because I’m a fighter

Because I’m the Tour Guide that Survives

Even when she’s unprepared for

the unexpected trail

that resides ahead

I am a compass

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The Apples and Oranges, Clay Figures (101/365)

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He thought too much
But as an apple
That was in his core
He wondered about life
About chewing
About calories
He thought about his lack
Of connection in or out the fruit bowl
But she saw him
She saw him and like that
She fell for him
Orange you glad to met me
She asked
A corny joke but he smiled
Apples and oranges
And as much as her
Parents tried they could not
Squeeze the love out of her body
She loved him
She told her parents
He was a not a bad apple
The oranges began to C all the goodness
Their daughter had seen in him
And the lovers lived a long
4 days while they aged rapidly
Till they became a smoothie
Forever mixed together
That is the story of Orangeina and her Apple-O
Never A Story of Lovers Blended Just So

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Other Art that I made from orange peels.

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To Send For You Soon, Poem (99/365)

I promise I will send for you soon

I told them

As I kissed them on the cheek

I thought it would be fast

Just a couple weeks

but weeks have turned into months

And months have started stacking up

And I fear it will only be longer

And I miss them

And I feel guilt for not making it sooner

Anxiety that will forget me

and that they have found another

My words rattle in my psyche

I promise I will send for you soon

Soon a word without a deadline

When I said soon I meant tomorrow

I hoped that life here could be easy

But it’s anything but instant

I don’t mind

But I’m scared soon will turn into never

It shall not

I will not let it

I think of them often as reasons

Reasons why I can not be defeated

I would  send for them today

But I can’t  bring fragile people

into rough environments

It’s hard to leave you

But I have to prep

I have to make room

I have to make it safe for you

You will see what I have been building

What I have been building here  for you

And you see every  wall, door, floor, ceiling

they all been pining for you

And I have never forgotten

I just haven’t felt like speaking

I don’t want to utter anything

that fills you with false security,  dates, and  hesitation

I promise to send for you

Soon

 

 

 

Meeting, Poem (98/365)

Not knowing what to say

I stare

How to start

think of news stories

No for that will cause chaos

Sports, but alas what if you don’t

A joke or  a movie

I could say something stupid

In hopes that you’ll

correct me and forgive me

and spark something there

Or I could just

say Hello

and see how we  jive

something honest might just work

Deep breath

Walk forward

Let’s hope I don’t loose my nerve

Or  chicken out

because I would like

to meet you

Not Guilty, poem (97/365)

This is a character poem, I was really inspired, by an article I read about a wife who didn’t get emotional in public when her husband died.

Cry or
they’ll call you
Guilty

Guilty of
Being Heartless
Being Fake
Being Cold

But if you
Don’t cry
When he dies
And they’ll charge you
You will plead
Not Guilty
And I will defend you

Exhibit A
Some of us
Are on delays
There are only 2
People I cried
About instantaneous
After hearing the news,
But there far more
Who made me numb
Shocked me
Till found myself
Missing them
In a puddle of tears
Months later

Exhibit B
We are different humans
We react different
I don’t like crying
In public places

Exhibit C-Z
All of the moments
You didn’t see
Like me being haunted
By memories
places we went
Trying to contemplate
Where is he now
Trying to contemplate
If I will ever be happy
Trying to contemplate
If I will ever not think about him
Me trying to keep it together
Because someone needs
to keep it together

We can’t all jump in caskets
By the way
there is nothing wrong
With jumping in caskets
If that’s how you feel
Grieve how you want
But don’t crucify her
When She won’t cry

Closing statements
It’s not that my heart
And soul are any smaller then yours
Or colder then yours
It’s just
I feel numb
I feel everything
And I feel this sadness
Which feels incurable
But if I don’t cry in front of you
PLEASE don’t call guilty
If you saw the way
I held him, and I loved him
How I looked at him day in and out
You would know
Beyond a doubt
That I’m innocent

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Laugh at it, poem (96/365)

If we can laugh at darkness
We will no longer
Be bond by it
It will no longer
Possess us
We laugh because
Even though it
Was dim,
Hopeless,
And scary at a time
We lived
We survived
We thrived
So laugh when
Life tries to break spirits
For lightness will always rise
Even in the darker nights
The sun will appear
And if you can’t laugh now
Cry, and let it out
One day you will
Laugh at it